As I sat on the bed in the ER, wearing my hospital gown, sporting my new hospital bracelet, and anxiously waiting for the doctor to come back with the results, all I could think about was the upcoming week ahead of me. It was finals week, and on Thursday I was planning on leaving California for the trip of a lifetime, every high school milers dream; the dream mile. Held in New York City this track meet is truly the real deal. I had received an invitation earlier that month and every day the golden ticket (placed right beside my bed) was a reminder that once I’m done with state, and then school finals, my summer would begin with the all paid expense trip to the big apple. I was determined to get to that meet and race my heart out and no stupid back pain was going to stop me.
In what seemed like an eternity, my ER doctor finally pushed the curtains back and gave me some answers. He explained to me that after viewing my results, (my lovely pee in a cup) that I had acquired a kidney infection. Wow. Didn’t see that one coming. I had about a million questions running through my mind. When did this happen? How did this happen? What can I do to make this unreal pain in my back go away? Will I be better in time for the dream mile? He explained to me that Kidney Infections are actually quite common and very painful. He told me that after spending a weekend in 100+ Fresno temperature I could have easily gotten dehydrated and therefore lead to a kidney infection. He said I was lucky I came in, any later and the infection could have lead to serious kidney damage.
Lucky I thought? Hmmm.. What a funny word to use to describe my situation. In my own selfish mind there was nothing lucky about a kidney infection, there was nothing lucky about getting one right before the dream mile, and there certainly nothing lucky about sitting on a bed in the emergency room just the night after the state championships.
Soon after we left the ER with some antibiotics that the doctor promised would get me better by Wednesday. It was Sunday night. The week that followed was a blur, struggling with finals, attempting to run, having immense pain in my lower back, and visiting the hospital various times to check on my kidney functions were all hurdles I had to jump over before getting to New York. The only thing getting me through the kayos was the thought of competing again. The day I thought would never come finally did, Thursday morning had arrived and I had survived. My mom drove me to the airport and told me try not to worry about my kidneys or the race, just enjoy the experience and have fun. This is exactly what I did. Once I landed in New York all my stress, doubt and cares in the world disappeared. I was greeted by Adidas representatives and handed both a room key to the Hyatt in the center of the city and a visa for all my food, and other necessities I would need throughput the weekend. The next couple of days I felt like I was living in a dream. Being handed endless amounts of Adidas gear, meeting with current and past track legends, and being able to explore the big apple with my coach were all experiences I will never forget.
On Saturday it was race day. Just a week after the state championships and I was ready. So much had changed within seven short days but despite the rollercoaster of events I still remembered how to compete. When the gun went off I quickly settled into the front of the pack and forced myself to get boxed in. Some runners hate being in that position but I absolutely love it, I have always been coached to do this and when I’m in that box I feel the most comfortable. I feel as if the pack is just carrying me along. The first two laps were great. I was settled near the front and even though the pace was fast I still felt very relaxed. Almost immediately after the second lap I hit a wall. My legs were weak and my cardio just wasn’t there. Girl after girl kept passing me and before I knew it the race was over and I crossed the finish line in last.
It was a humbling experience to say the least. I remember walking off the track confused, dazed, upset, and just plain angry. My coach Dan Gruber talked to me shortly after and said my legs were probably just dead because of the antibiotics I was still on. I refused to believe this. I hated having an excuse. I always have and always will hate athletes that refuse to accept defeat. I lost, and I was ok with it. You know what I thought, today in that race I gave it my best and today their best beat my best.
I felt sorry for myself for a total of about 2 minutes and then it all became clear to me. Some kids would do anything to be in the position I was in right now. There are only a handful of high schoolers that get to be apart of such an amazing experience. An overwhelming sense of excitement and gratitude came over me and I remember thinking I am the luckiest kid alive. I quickly realized that I was in New York City with amazing runners and friends from all over the states. I was ready to have some fun in the big apple and create memories that would stay with me for the rest of my life. That is exactly what I did. When I look back now to the dream mile, I don’t think about the place I finished, or my kidneys, or how slow I ran. Instead I remember being interviewed in beautiful central park, getting onto the jumbotron in time square, meeting Jim Ryun, racing in front of a huge crowd for the first time, staying up all night with the city that never sleeps, and meeting so many new friends who were all sharing the same dream with me. I still can’t believe all of this actually happened. It felt like I was living in a dream, but hey, I guess that’s why they call it the dream mile.
In my next post I will talk about the start to an epic senior year. Stay lucky folks!
